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Monday, August 18, 2014

I Don’t Feel Like It

In the life of any blog, there are going to be days you just don’t feel like it.
Blogging, that is.
I don’t feel like blogging today.
I could be telling you about the poodle that raised me which is the reason I still feel the urge to urinate when I see a fire hydrant.
But I don’t feel like it.
I could tell you how a cabal of scientists has conspired to infect disinfectant wipes with a virus that causes OCD.
Nope – don’t feel like it.
Then there’s the representative from Oregon that joined a monastery and took a vow of silence. He’s become so popular that his fellow congress-people have nominated him for speaker.
You won’t hear about it from me – I don’t feel like it.
Why do shelf and cheap furniture makers find it easier to glue millions of specks of sawdust into board shape than to just use… boards?
I won’t tell you – don’t feel like it.
Then there’s the mighty condor that flies everywhere and eats anything. Why is it endangered, but bugs that insist on flying into your mouth when you’re breathing hard remain too numerous to count?
Don’t ask me. I might know – just don’t ask. I don’t feel like talking about it.
So, celebrities that don’t want to talk to admirers are ‘blowing them off.’ The admirers they blow off are called fans. Fans are things we use to… blow things off. Do you think that’s strange?
If so, please don’t bring it up.
As I might have mentioned - I don’t want to blog today. I don’t want to talk about sticky spots on the floor, the glories of finishing second on reality TV shows, or why the Department of Education needs a SWAT team.
Oh - by the way - I learned to fly.
I just don’t want to get in to it.

Thanks for understanding.

Here's a little guy that gets it.